A Day in the Life of a Trashcan

illustrated by Norman Stickwell

I truly believe that the trashcan is the most unsung device in society today. Can you imagine a house without at least one garbage receptacle? I lived in one for a semester in college, and brother, I don't recommend it. What about walking down the avenue with an empty Slurpee cup? If there wasn't a trashcan nearby, you'd probably just throw the cup to the ground. The trashcan is what separates humans from... well, from mammals that live in their own filth. I think they're called Swedes.

And yet, do we recognize their hard work? No! Society continues to ignore these containers of our non-bodily waste. Heck, we write Broadway shows about cats and rent and C.H.U.D.s living under opera houses, but what does the trashcan get? It gets to hold all the food wrappers and wadded-up programs from these shows. That's all and not a penny more.

Our problem, I suppose, is that we cannot grasp the hard life the trashcan leads. I have a hard-enough time understanding my friend Neil, and he supposedly speaks English. So, I have decided to live one day of my life as a trashcan. It is only by doing this can I fully understand and sing the praises of this simple receptacle.