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By Rob Terrell

Sure, we VGGs argue about lots of things, like whose turn is it to pay the rent, or who stinks the worst. But this the most divisive question we know. It's come up a dozen times, over the years. Which Van Gogh-Gogh would make the ugliest woman?

I don't recall how it started, but this question rears its nasty head every so often. We started arguing about this back in our early, N.C. days. The group consensus has always been that Jason would make the ugliest woman.

Jason countered that he might be the ugliest woman of the group, but he'd also be the easiest and that counts for something — in fact, it should make his overall attractiveness far greater than that of the prudish T. Mike-based woman, who even as a man needs to be goaded by the group into getting dates.

Since this oft-burning controversy has honestly been dormant for some time, I figured it was time to bring it up at practice again, with a sly little "hey wouldn't Jason make an ugly woman" kind of aside at some silent moment.

But it recently occurred to me -- we have no silent moments. And also — why not let the voters on the internet decide which of us would make the ugliest woman? But how to do it in such a way that Charles couldn't cheat?

Working under the dubious premise that the hottest man would probably also be the hottest woman, I decided to submit our existing individual photos from the web site to the infamous www.hotornot.com. This site lets internet users submit a photo and others affix a ranking, from 1 to 10, on each. (I tried to submit the group's photos into the "woman" section of the site, only to have them be rejected.)

So, gentle reader, I urge you. Go and vote. And we'll see, we'll just see, won't we, who is the fairest VGG of them all.

© copyright 2001 The Van Gogh-Goghs