Miller-Milkis-Boyett Productions and Paramount Television Present:

Bosom Buddies

An eminently forgettable dodge-falling-stuff-style game, this sitcom tie-in would have been quickly forgotten if it hadn't been for the events of February 9, 1983. On that day, in a crowded MIT robotics lab, a second-hand L-9900 robotic arm controller became the first non-human to score more than a million points in a video game.

Artificial intelligence experts were astounded -- just one year before, leading researcher Ivan DuPiis had predicted it would take 100 years to create a program that could even understand the plot of "Donkey Kong." Yet here were three grad students who had managed to beat a highly anticipated new game with less than 500 lines of assembly code! Were the trio computer geniuses? No. It soon came out that the students had simply discovered that the Pankomi Co. didn't spend enough time designing their levels.

In the game, the player's goal was to sneak into the Susan B. Anthony hotel, change clothes, and sneak out again. The whole time, prudish enforcers hovered overhead, showering down fistfuls of mayonnaise. After less than an hour of play, the college students discovered that Pankomi had only programmed three different combinations of mayo splatters in each level. After that, it was a simple task to teach the robotic arm how to recognize which pattern was being used.

When the news hit, Pankomi immediately cancelled its release and announced that they were "reworking" the game. Not surprisingly, the company went under shortly afterwards, and the only copies are a few promo cartridges prepared for AtariCon '82.

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