From: "blakjacq"
Date: Tue, 14 Aug 2001 20:55:29 -0400
Subject: question for Dr. Joe

Dr Joe:

My girlfriend keeps telling me that I'm not "amorous" anymore. After a hard's days work full of meetings and personell decisions and trying to keep my projects afloat, I just wanna come home and have a beer. Is there something wrong with being so tired all the time? Is this a medical issue or should I just tell the little woman that she's gotta give me some space?

Sleepy In Florida

Dr. Joe's Reply:

Yes yes yes! This is indeed a medical issue. In fact, it's several. Thank god you emailed me in time. Let's work through them one by one.

First of all, it's hardly normal to feel "tired." This can lead to problems such as a full night's sleep -- and even worse, a full night's sleep on a daily basis. This condition, wherein a male subject endures an entire night's rest, is known as "male pattern sleeping." Fear not if this afflicts you: it can be cured. There are pills you can take.

Secondly, let's talk about your girlfriend. Is she not turning you on? Perhaps she could lose a few? Nothing a little surgery couldn't help? Maybe she oughtta shut up and go ahead and get that tit job you've been bugging her about. Nothing makes the ol' compass needle swing north like a brand spankin' new bag of balloons. And while they're in there, a little lipo never hurts.

Also, you might want to send me her phone number. I have a one-night therapy routine that can help. An injection of sorts is often in order. I can repeat the process as often as necessary, given ample time between visits, of course.

In good health,