Prove Us Wrong (the First)!
In September of 1998, the Van Gogh-Goghs reached deep into their collective wisdom and produced a truism for the ages. Silence greeted us, as the inescabable truth of our statement was, well, like, inescapable. C'mon. Keep up with us.
But then, just as we prepared to retire to our well-appointed, palatial, yet not overbearing HQ in triumph, a still, small voice proved us wrong.
Judge for yourselves....
RESOLVED: All bands that have a place name in their name, are lame! They just are. We're sorry, but the evidence is overwhelming:
Van Gogh-Goghs Proved Wrong!
- Atlanta Rhythm Section
- Black Oak Arkansas
- Bonds, Gary U.S.,
- California Raisins, The
- Chicago Bears, The (The Superbowl Shuffle)
- Frankie Goes to Hollywood
- George Thorogood and his Delaware Destroyers
- Georgia Satellites
- Kentucky Headhunters
- L.A. Guns
- Miami Sound Machine
- Notting Hillbillies
- Ohio Express
- Spandau Ballet
- Stanford Prison Experiment
- To Live and Shave In L.A.
Oct. 5, 1998 2:17 PM
All right, half-wits: Gary U.S. Bonds rocked very hard back in the
1700s, and anyone who would decry Black Oak Arkansas is either a
humorless twit or a Labradford fanatic.
The Ohio Players were better than 500 Sonic Youths (well, toward their
early 80s end they sorta sucked, but still...), and To Live and Shave in
L.A. are not only superb, but their name has fuck-all to do with Los
Angeles, although, of course, it's there... any fan of country gospel
knows that they took their moniker from Ron Jeremy's loathsome
same-named "pussy shaving" flick of the mid-80s, but what TL&S liked
about it was that it (the original Jeremy title) was such an atrocious
pun on the previous year's William Friedkin policier "To Live and Die in
L.A."... besides, on TL&S's recent French-released alb "Les
Tricoteuses", they call themselves To Live and Shave in Laura Ashley...
which IS retarded, but affixed to a cool album nonetheless.
So, your premise thus flawed, let's get to the coup de grace- if the
aforementioned groups are indeed "lame", then these groups too merit
your attention, and sport handles as least as lame as your own ("Van
Gogh-Gogh" is certainly as clever in its way as, say, Brian Jonestown
Massacre, John Cougar Concentration Camp, et al.)...
Just off the top of my head, actual place name/band name match-ups:
The Hampton Grease Band (Hampton, GA)
The Sun City Girls (Sun City, AZ)
Azusa Plane (Azusa, CA)
Mount Shasta (Mount Shasta, CA)
The Village of Savoonga (Savoonga, AK)
- Gary U.S. Bonds at one time was not lame.
- The Ohio Players at one time were not lame.
- To Live and Shave in L.A. have changed their name.
- Brian Jonestown Massacre and John Cougar Concentration Camp have funnier names than the Van Gogh-Goghs.
Thus, The Van Gogh-Goghs have been proven wrong.
Oct. 22, 1998 5:21 AM
Isn't Nirvana technically a place name?
Although the number of people committing suicide after Kurt Nobrain did
was quite lame.
- No, Nirvana is not technically a place name. It is fictional and/or mythical.
- "Kurt Nobrain" isn't as funny as "the Van Gogh-Goghs."
Nov. 4, 1998 3:05 AM
The presidents of the United States of America possibly?
(They do have some mildly humorous songs (so does Rod Stewart, but I think he's serious)
They don't really suck. Maybe just produce a mild vaccum...
We have checked and The Presidents of the United States of America are indeed currently lame. However it is believed they had a brief seventy-two hour period of not being lame just as "Lump" climbed the charts.
Rod Stewart needs a place name in his name.
Nov. 10, 1998 9:52 PM
YEAH!!! FUTURE SOUND OF LONDON!!! HAS A NAME OF A PLACE IN IT!! AND ITS
PHAT TECHNO!!! FRIGGIN EAT IT!!! YEAH!!! YEAH!!!
YOU GOT NOTHIN!!!!
WHAT YOU GOT?!?!?!
- The Future Sound of London is apparently, not lame.
- The netizen has their "caps lock" button activated.
- The Van Gogh-Goghs are to eat it, booyaa.
Nov. 11, 1998 10:36 PM
what about hte mighty mighty bostones? that has boston in it...
- First, sentences begin with a capital letter.
- Second, it's "the."
- Third, the band is The Mighty Mighty Bosstones. It has Boston in it, but only if you take out the extra S.
- Fourth, they do, indeed, suck.
We would like to thank all the people (or net crawling bots) who proved us wrong. But you proved us wrong and made us look like fools in front of the entire Internet, so we have no intention of displaying any gratitude whatsoever. Thank God none of our parents know what the Internet is, much less that we have a website.
But what have we Van Gogh-Goghs learned? Well, I guess that sometimes our usually well-deserved hubris can get us thinkin' a mite crazy. I mean, who among us doesn't have his or her own black Nazareth tee-shirt with the sleeves ripped off? And a place name in a band's name doesn't necessarily equal suckosity, but it does skew you in that direction.
As our punishment for being proved wrong, I, the VGG webmaster, will not treat myself to several delicious Clark bars. I will force myself to eat ice cream, instead.
Thanks for playing. . . Prove Us Wrong!